080602

Sunday morning.

I was still feverish when I woke up to a ruckus from my next door neighbors. It was an apparent fight between the couple. The girl locked the guy out. The guy went on banging the door while cursing liberally. The girl opened the door, crying. After a short while, the guy walked out with a duffle bag which I presumed to contain his belongings. I couldn't care less what the fight was about. But I was worried for their cat, Lucy. I wondered if Lucy was hiding under the bed.

I stayed lying on my sofa wrapped in fleece blanket. Just the thought of lifting the blanket off to walk over to the bedroom gave me chills. And I watched tennis on television even though I could not really see the ball due to poor reception. Better that than infomercials, I thought.

What r u doing? he text'ed. I could have ignored it. But I didn't. By mid-afternoon, he was over at my apartment.

We had very early dinner and finished an entire bottle of Lambrusco. He said he's going to Chicago for a week. A job interview? I asked. He nodded. He would be arriving in Chicago the day I would be leaving.

Later, as we lay on my bed with his arms around me, he asked,

"Why do you want to keep moving away? Why don't you just stay here?"

"Speak for yourself," I said, "you're the one going to a job interview in Chicago".

"But the job is not in Chicago. It could be in San Francisco, Pittsburgh, anywhere, but I'm really after the job in Irvine," he answered.

"Really?" I questioned. Then we both fell silent for a while.

"Then should we live together if you get that job in Irvine?" I asked. I wasn't serious. I just wanted to put him on the edge.

But what I got back was unhesitating and enthusiastic, "sure."

"Really?" I questioned, again, then started playing along.

"Just don't expect me to cook. We'll go out to eat on the days I have to cook," he said.

"Then you pay rent, I'll take care of all the household stuff."

He agreed.

"Well, we would still need our own space, so at least two bedrooms...."

"Can we get a dog?" I asked.

"Depends on how big a place we get," he replied.
Oh, he's serious about this, I thought.

"But you know, your mother could decide to visit you and we'd be busted," I said. Then added, "if my mother doesn't bust us first--she's closer by."
I thought about my father, then his brother, then his wife, then her brother, then his son who was lying next to me. I certainly did not want to create havoc in all our families in between.

We did not speak of the matter afterwards. We just fell asleep tangled in each other's arms. And I dreamt. I dreamt that I was standing at the edge of a cliff late at night, looking out into the midnight blue of the sky and the ocean. Full moon rose from the west, its shine almost blinding to my eyes, then quickly set on the east. The night was enveloped in the comforting darkness again.

In the morning we left my apartment together. He gave me a little hug.

"I'll call you," he said.

I nodded. "Drive carefully."

I got in my car and headed to work. Another same old goddamn week was starting.